Conversations With My Father: part I

disclaimer: the following views expressed in this post are most decidedly NOT PC and are in no way intended to offend. I would not write about it if not for the fact that my dad's just so ridiculous it's funny.

Waking up one rainy Thursday morning, I walk into the kitchen to pack my lunch for the day. Typically my mom is already up, having cooked breakfast for my brother and seen him off to school, and my dad too--usually for lack of anything better to do (like sleep). So, when I see him bolt into the kitchen like a madman with that wild gleam in his eyes, I know it's going to be one of "those" days.

Dad: "Did you hear? Islamics are now lending money to people at zero interest!"
Me: "I know dad. Islamic law prohibits usury. It's been around since the 8th century."
Dad: (clearly not listening) "But now they're lending money to non-Islamics! Where do they get such money? The Federal Treasury doesn't back them. I wonder where they get all that money to lend people."
Me: "....."
Dad: "You should take out a loan from them. It's available for everyone now."
Me: "Where did you read this?"
Dad: "It was in the news .(it could have come from a monkey on the street and he would still say it was from the "news")"
Me: (facetiously) "Well, they probably do it so they can eventually force you to convert to their religion and take over the world."
Dad: "Yeah. I bet they brainwash you with their money."
Me: "Mmmhmm. The only smart investment is to painstakingly save your money penny-by-penny in a low-interest savings account that won't even compensate for inflation."
Mom: "That's right! Never be greedy. Nothing good can come from easy money."